finally

The IF made a decision so we finally and officially have a donor who is available now!! we are on our way!!! I will probably have regular updates from here on out.
Thanks for reading!

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waiting.....

I apologise for the lack of updates. It has been a bit of a waiting game lately. The IF had finally found and picked a donor. A college cutie. We were told she would be available either beginning of Dec. Or Jan. She was waiting for school to start to arrange the time off with her professors beings the reproductive clinic is not open during Xmas break. Well yesterday the IF was told she wouldn't be available till march, spring break.
Aaahhh that sucks
Not wanting to wait I offered to do a traditional surrogacy.
I think he's a little hesitant which I fine of course I just wanted offer. I know how anxious he is to start his family. He decided to keep looking and found two donors that will work with ORM and are ready NOW!!!
I think this will be happening very shortly!! He has asked for my help to decide between the two!!
I should have another update soon!!

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the donor part 2

After reviewing many profiles and multiple agencies the IF (with a little help from your truly) were able to narrow it down to the top three. He submitted the choices and waiting for the egg donor agency to work their magic......

The #2 choice responds right away but we wait to see if #1 responds. After two weeks and no response he goes with #2 only find out she has changed her mind :(

Back to the search!

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Egg Donor

The IF and I are communicating regularly. This is so exciting. He asked for my opinion on egg donors. What a hard choice so many to choose from and so many very beautiful donors. He sends me his picks and asks me to pick my top choices. I'm so flattered. On to getting testing done for me. Hoping to transfer late August or September!!!

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The Unexpected

A little bummed that it didn't work out I began to look forward to talking to my next potential match.
Checking my email regularly I was surprise to see an email from the agency so soon. I opened it to read, that the IF I had talked to before
"didn't want to do the surrogacy without me".
I was both shocked and extremely flattered!! How exciting its official I have a match. Now I can start communicating with him and get the preliminary testing out of the way. I can't even describe how excited I am. I get to help start a family and soon I will be prego again!!!

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The Hiccup

As I wait anxious and excited a few days pass. An email arrives!!! The IF would love to have me as his surrogate.....BUT, he wants to use the agency for matching only.

At first I thought that's no big deal, so his lawyer handles the escrow (money). As I thought about it and Kathy explained it to me I didn't like the idea. I sought a second opinion from a friend who is on her third surrogacy (Tina). Ultimately it comes down to what I'm comfortable with. Beings this is my first go around and I'm not sure of the process I decided to tell Kathy I was not comfortable with the agency not doing the escrow portion and everything in-between.
Also Tina said something that really helped me,
" When its right everything will fall into place"
I agree, the search continues...

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The Match!!

After filling the application, talking to friends and family, I'm ready!!

So what's next?

Finding a match......

After a few weeks the agency contacts me with information on an intended father ( IF). I am to sift through the bio and decide if I would like to have a conference call. How exciting, the possibility of a match already. After reading thru I want to know more. Let's talk


The conference call is Kathy from the agency, me and in this case the IF. After coordinating our schedules we talk!!!
At this stage it is important to make sure that the you agree on the big issues such as selective reduction and in what instance is abortion an option if at all. After that is all clear for me I want to feel a connection. Feel comfortable with the person and ultimately want to work together.

The call goes great!!! We are on the same page with the major issues, have a great conversation and personally I felt a connection! Kathy tells us to let her know one way or the other and we would proceed from there. That evening I sent an email stating I would love to work with this IF.

Now I wait, anxious and excited to see if he wants to work with me!!

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Commonly Asked Questions???

After showing interest with an agency for surrogacy I received an email containing a very lengthy application. As I started to work on said application I began to talk with family and friends and show my enthusiam. And with conversation comes questions; I find myself answering similar questions over and over and justifying statements made.

Why would you want to do that?
Mike and I have decided at this point we are more than happy with our two adorable little boys. But I still want the joys of being pregnant, that's right I ENJOY being pregnant!!! So on the selfish side this meets my need to be pregnant again. Also, on the most important selfless side, I get to help someone who clearly really really wants a family. What a wonderful gift I'm able to give!! Honestly I can't wait!!!

How are you going to give up a baby after carrying it for nine months?
It's not mine! From the beginning I know this child is not mine. I am here to help intended parent(s) fulfill their dream of having a family. Also I have the choice of using or not using my own eggs. At this point I choose not. So this child also is not genetically mine.


Is that something you get paid for?
Yes, handsomely

Are you sure you want to do this?
YES, YES, YES I have absolutely no doubt in my mind that this is a gift I was destined to give. I hope to do it twice!!

How does Mike (my husband) feel about you doing this?
I have his complete and full support. I have an amazing husband who I can share my excitement with, every step of the way.

If you carry three and ones a girl can we keep her?
NO MOM!!!

Wow that's amazing, I could never do that.
I think you have to have the right mind set going in and realize Its about giving a wonderful gift. It probably isn't for everyone....:)

Won't you get attached to the baby?
Inherently I will assume that this is an emotional process and will incur some level of attachment, but as I said before this baby is not mine


How does that work?
Well that is more than a short answer and probably why your following my journey....lol

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The Idea

After preschool one day I was clucking with the hens about being pregnant. Talking with one mom she had mentioned giving birth to twins. Twins? I thought to my self, I've never seen twins or heard of any other children of hers but her little girl in preschool. Being the direct (and confused) person that I am I said, you have twins? She giggled and told me of being a surrogate, twice and she had been matched again and was working with her third intended family. I wanted to know more.

This also reminded me of a time (age 10-24 ish) when I was NEVER having children...lol. In my early twenties knowing I didn't want children I still wanted to have the amazing experience of growing a child in my body and giving birth. At this time I had offered to a co-working who had been trying to have a baby for multiple years to surrogate for her. And The seed was planted.

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